Average Jane

Author: Average Jane

  • Average Jane’s Pre-Blogher Day

    I left for Blogher early Thursday morning last week and arrived in San Jose around 1:00 p.m.  On the shuttle to the Hyatt, I met my first blogger of the trip, Megan Garnhum.  As the van pulled into the resort parking lot, we spotted Heather Armstrong, whose identity we easily confirmed by the bandage on her arm.  We talked about how weird it was that we knew so much about someone neither of us had ever met. The other people on the shuttle probably thought we were insane.

    The instant I stepped off the shuttle, I ran into Eden Kennedy and Alice Bradley.  I was wearing the "Writing well is the best revenge" shirt I’d bought from Mrs. Kennedy last year, so it was the perfect icebreaker for introducing myself.  While I chatted with them and other people (sorry I can’t I.D. you – it was all kind of a blur), a hand shot through the pack and I heard a voice say, "Hi, I’m Heather."

    It was Heather Armstrong.  I introduced myself and didn’t say, "Duh, as if I don’t know that!"

    Within the first hour I was there, I also ran into Amy Storch, Yvonne DiVita and Susan Getgood.

    Almost everyone I talked to initially was an official conference speaker, so they were headed to some shindig to which I wasn’t invited.  I was really hungry, so I had an excruciatingly slow meal in the hotel restaurant and wandered around the grounds of the resort for a while trying to decide what to do with myself for the rest of the day.

    When it got closer to dinner time, people started gathering near the pool.  I met Kyle Karl (sorry – I don’t know why I kept getting your name goofed up) from Secondhand Tryptophan, SueBob from Red Stapler, Jane of By Jane, and Marjorie from MeeVee (among many others).  I had a chance to greet Toby Bloomberg for a moment before she left for the speaker dinner.

    The poolside group eventually scooted a bunch of tables together and ordered dinner as more and more people arrived and joined the group.  I got to meet Mocha Momma (whose name is actually Kelly), Patricia of Join Me in Snarkville and lots of other people whose names escaped me once I mixed their business cards in with the rest of the pile.

    Speaking of business cards, I had stupidly forgotten to load up on them before I left my office on Wednesday, so I had barely more than a dozen to pass out.  I ended up writing my name and contact information on notebook paper for most of the weekend.

    The early birds finished out Thursday evening trying, mostly in vain, to get drinks from the understaffed hotel bar.  I gave up around 10:00 p.m. (midnight, as far as my body was concerned) and went to bed.

  • Average Jane Comes Home

    I’m back from BlogHer, but I haven’t had enough time to digest everything and prepare a post about it yet.  That’ll have to wait until tomorrow.  I had a wonderful time reconnecting with lots of people I met last year, introducing myself to people I was too chicken to talk to last year, and meeting lots of new bloggers whose work I’m anxious to start reading.

    Flickr now contains several highly unflattering photos of me, and I haven’t even uploaded my own yet.

    Yesterday was a long travel day with frequent delays.  Fortunately, I had a fun travel companion to chat with the whole way.

    More on Tuesday!

  • Average Jane Plans Ahead

    I have one more day left to get ready for BlogHer and I’ve taken care of the really essential stuff, like sending screen captures to Susan Getgood so I’ll be prepared to speak on the Business Blog Case Studies "unpanel" Saturday afternoon.

    There’s still a lot to be done before I’m ready to go.  For example, I need to go to the tiny toiletries aisle at the drug store and decide which little toothpaste and shower gel to buy.  I also need to find a roll of duct tape with which to remove all of the white cat hair that our calico has been diligently applying to my suitcase since I got it out of the closet earlier this week.

    I have a great idea for entertaining myself on the plane and getting valuable work done at the same time.  I’m going to put the instrumental versions of the last songs I need to write on my iPod and bring a notebook and a pencil.  While I’m in the air, I can play the songs over and over as needed until I’ve completed the lyrics.  It’ll be hard to keep from humming them to myself, but I think I can suppress the urge.

    I think I’m pretty much ready to go.  I found my passport to take in case my expired license/renewal receipt combo doesn’t cut it with airline security.  My passport photo is even more horrifying than my license photo.  When it was taken I had blonde, much shorter hair, was at least 20 pounds heavier, and looked downright matronly.  Maybe it isn’t such a good I.D. option.

    Enjoy the rest of your week!  I’ve decided that dragging a laptop through two airports in each direction is way more trouble than it’s worth, so I’m leaving my computer at home.  I’ll post about my San Jose adventures on Monday.

  • Average Jane’s Summer TV Picks

    Despite the fact that I have had almost no time to watch TV this summer, I’ve still stumbled across a couple of new faves. 

    I don’t know how we missed the whole first season, but my husband and I love, love, love this season of "It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia."  It’s sort of like "Seinfeld" with the misanthropy and moral bankrupcy dialed up to "11."  How many comedies can you think of that make you ask yourself, "Why is it that I know that $200 is too much for a rock of crack?"

    I’m also enjoying "Psych" so far, even though it’s exceedingly formulaic.  The actors and situation are appealing enough that I can be patient with it.  It also amuses me that Dule Hill’s character is a pharmaceutical sales rep who has enough free time all day to trail around while his friend pretends to be a psychic detective.  Pharm reps, your secret is out!

    "The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr." just came out on DVD, twelve years after it was cancelled for being way too weird for the general populace (that’s my interpretation anyway).  My copy of the set arrived last week and my husband and I are carefully considering when we might have time to plant ourselves on the couch to watch many, many hours of our man, Bruce Campbell.

    I understand that there will be a DVD set of "The Tick" animated show coming out in August, so that’ll be next on my Amazon list.  I have the live-action show on DVD, but I still love the cartoon best of all.  Die Fledermaus, American Maid, Sewer Urchin, El Seed, the Evil Midnight Bomber What
    Bombs At Midnight…you can’t beat the classic characters.

    Am I missing any other good summer shows or DVDs?  Once I get back from BlogHer next week, I’ll be due to spend some time rotting my brain in front of the TV.

  • Average Jane’s Karaoke Report

    So I sang karaoke on Thursday night.

    It took a while for the party to filter over to the place where the karaoke setup was, so I had plenty of time to ascertain that the huge book of available songs contained AC/DC’s "Highway to Hell."  I filled out a slip and handed it to the karaoke guy with the caveat that I was NOT going to sing first.

    I sang second.

    The song was extremely well-received, but considering the hideous caterwauling that most of the other participants were inflicting upon the room, I didn’t know how flattered to be by the compliments.

    I kept flipping through the songbook trying to find something else I knew and liked, but the selections, although ample, were rather strange.  There weren’t many songs by hard rock bands and the ones there were often leaned toward the ballad-y or obscure.  I couldn’t figure out why there was only one Guns ‘n Roses song but about ten Alice Cooper songs, including such guaranteed party-stoppers as "The Ballad of Dwight Fry."  (Because nothing says, "Aren’t we having fun?" like a little ditty about confinement in a mental institution.)

    One of my dad’s friends came up and suggested that I should sing Melissa Etheridge’s "I’m the Only One."  I’ve always liked that song, but since it’s not really a style I ordinarily do, I’d never sung it before.  I spent some time thinking through the song to make sure I knew how all of the sections went and eventually submitted my name to sing it.

    By the time I was called up to sing again, everyone was all extra drunk, so I got to feel like a complete rock star as people cheered through every chorus.  I managed to pull off the song pretty well, even though it covers almost my entire singing range.  My vocal teacher would have been proud of me for singing something loud and powerful that isn’t straight-ahead metal.  She’s been trying to get me to vary my technique.

    I guess I made a lasting impression on my audience because different people kept mentioning my singing the next day.  One class even clapped when I came in to give them some paperwork.  I guess I’ll know who to invite when the band finally starts getting gigs!

  • Average Jane Screws Up

    My general absentmindedness has caught up with me in two noticeable ways this week:

    1. I finally realized yesterday that my driver’s license expired on my birthday (July 7th).  It’s hard to believe I let it go so long, particularly since I DESPISE the photo I’ve been stuck with for the last six years.

      I went to the license bureau to get a renewal today and stood in line
      for an hour with way more people than I would have expected to see there on a
      Thursday afternoon.  It turns out I won’t get my new license in the mail for up to a month, so I’ll need to dig up my passport to take to the airport when I fly to BlogHer next week.  Grrr.

      The license bureau gave me a weird receipt that I can carry until my license arrives.  It includes a black and white version of the photo I’ll have on my license and I can already predict that I will grow to loathe that photo as much as I did its predecessor.  It’s obvious that I wasted my time going home this afternoon specifically to wash and re-style my hair for my license photo.  (I hope I’m not the only one who does that sort of thing.)

    2. When I posted about watching VH1 Rock Honors back in June, I was too lazy to look up the correct spelling of Gilby Clark’s name and thus added an extra "e" to his first name before the "y."  Now my blog is getting a metric buttload of Google traffic from "Rockstar: Supernova" viewers who are equally spelling-challenged. 

      Hi, everyone!  What do you think of the show so far?  Don’t you wish Zayra would get voted off already?  I’d love to see a woman win, but not that disrespectful beyotch.  And what’s Tommy Lee’s problem?  Is he acting out because Pammie is getting married to Kid Rock next week?  Hitting on all the female singers is just sleazy, dude.  And lay off the coke.  Don’t think we can’t tell.

    Wow, that was fun.  Thanks for encouraging me to bring the snark, Cagey and Mocha Momma.  I should give it free rein more often.  Have a great weekend, everybody!

  • Average Jane Checks In

    Today is Day 4 of the six-day seminar I’m running all over town to help conduct.  This is supposed to be the last day of 100+ degree heat, but that’s not much consolation.  Yesterday the extreme heat was almost too much for my little hybrid, so I’m taking the Jeep today.

    Tonight there’s a social event for the seminar attendees that will include karaoke.  Normally I’m anti-karaoke because it takes income away from bands and musicians.  However, I’m relaxing my stance just for today because I’m looking forward to seeing all of my dad’s goofball friends trying to sing.

    My dad has been going around telling everyone that I’m going to sing tonight, which is true.  I’m trying to formulate a karaoke strategy for myself, but it isn’t easy since I don’t know what songs will be available.  I’m hoping for a nice, solid AC/DC tune, or maybe some Led Zeppelin. 

    My husband is sick this week with a sore throat and cough and I’m trying to resist his germs by sheer force of will.  The last thing I need to finish out the week and head into BlogHer is a week-long illness.  Wish me luck.

  • Average Jane, Couch Potato

    I picked up this meme from Ben at Old Silly Bear (who picked it up from Daisy).  I think it ably demonstrates why my brain is stuffed with so much useless pop culture trivia.

    Here’s a list of television shows. Bold all the shows of which you have seen at least 3 episodes.

    24
    7th Heaven
    Adam-12
    Alfred Hitchcock Presents
    Alias

    Angel
    Arrested Development
    Battlestar Galactica
    Baywatch
    Beverly Hills 90210
    Bonanza
    Boy Meets World
    Buffy the Vampire Slayer
    Bug Juice

    Chappelle’s Show
    Charlie’s Angels
    Charmed
    Cheers
    Columbo
    Commander in Chief
    Coronation Street
    Coupling
    Cowboy Bebop

    CSI: Miami
    CSI: NY
    Curb Your Enthusiasm
    Danny Phantom
    Dawson’s Creek
    Dead Like Me

    Deadwood
    Degrassi: The Next Generation
    Desperate Housewives
    Doctor Who
    Eastenders
    Entourage
    ER
    Everwood
    Extras
    Family Guy
    Farscape
    Father Ted

    Fawlty Towers
    Felicity
    Firefly
    Frasier
    Friends
    Futurama
    Get Smart
    Gilligan’s Island
    Gilmore Girls
    Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.
    Grey’s Anatomy
    Gunsmoke
    Hannah Montana
    Happy Days
    Hogan’s Heroes
    Home and Away
    Home Improvement
    Homicide: Life on the Street

    House
    I Dream of Jeannie
    I Love Lucy
    Inuyasha
    Invader Zim

    Invasion
    JAG
    Jackass

    Joey
    Little House on the Prairie
    Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman

    Lost
    Lost in Space
    Love, American Style
    M*A*S*H
    MacGyver

    Malcolm in the Middle
    Married… With Children
    Medium
    Melrose Place
    Miami Vice
    Mission: Impossible

    Monk
    My Three Sons
    My Two Dads
    NCIS
    Neighbours
    Nip/Tuck
    Numb3rs
    NYPD Blue
    Only Fools and Horses
    Oz
    Perry Mason
    Pokemon
    Power Rangers
    Prison Break
    Rescue Me
    Roseanne

    Roswell
    Saved by the Bell

    Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?
    Scrubs
    Seinfeld
    Sex and the City
    Six Feet Under
    Smallville
    So Weird
    South Park
    Spongebob Squarepants
    Starsky and Hutch
    Star Trek
    Star Trek: The Next Generation
    Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
    Star Trek: Voyager
    Stargate Atlantis
    Stargate SG-1
    Superman
    Supernatural
    Surface

    Taxi
    Teen Titans

    That 70’s Show
    That’s So Raven

    The 4400
    The Addams Family
    The Andy Griffith Show
    The A-Team
    The Avengers
    The Beverly Hillbillies
    The Brady Bunch
    The Cosby Show
    The Daily Show
    The Dead Zone
    The Flintstones
    The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
    The Good Life
    The Honeymooners

    The Jetsons
    The Love Boat
    The Munsters
    The O.C.

    The Office
    The Shield
    The Simpsons
    The Six Million Dollar Man
    The Sopranos
    The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
    The Twilight Zone
    The Waltons
    The West Wing
    The Wonder Years

    The X-Files
    Third Watch
    Three’s Company
    Twin Peaks

    Veronica Mars
    Weeds
    Whose Line is it Anyway?

    Will and Grace
    Wings

  • Interview With Average Jane

    BlogMe

    In preparation for BlogHer, I’m answering some "get to know me" questions sent by Kt:

    1. When did you start blogging and why? 
    I started Average Jane in early 2004 after a couple false starts with H2G2 and Diaryland in the early 2000s.  I did it because I love the idea of being able to journal my life for my own purposes and share it with interested others at the same time. 

    2. Who do you read every day, rain or shine?
    See that list on the right labeled "Other Blogs I Like"?  Yeah, all of those.  Every day.  (Except for PostSecret, which is only updated on Sundays.)

    3. How do you feel about meeting
    bloggers in real life? Are you nervous? Will you have great
    expectations? What do you hope to take away from the BlogHer experience?
    I love the idea of meeting the bloggers I read, and I didn’t do enough of that last year.  Cagey and I got caught up touring the Winchester House and missed the pre-dinner, so I think we started out at a disadvantage.  This year I’ll be there early, so I should have lots of time to socialize and get to know people.  My expectations are neutral – I’m a "wait and see what happens" kind of person.  I hope the takeaways are some new "real world" friends, some new business contacts, and a lot of knowledge that I can take back and use for work and for my personal blogs.

    4. Are you and your blogging persona the same person?
    More or less.  I probably come off as nicer and more rational on the blog than I do in person.  Also, because I never discuss my work, my life as featured in the blog has a rather large hole that I hope isn’t too noticeable.

    5.  Soon everyone’s going to meet each other at BlogHer. Important question. How do you party?
    Food is vital.  I haven’t chosen an alcohol strategy yet.  Beer? Wine? Martinis? Frou-frou drinks garnished with fruit and umbrellas?  I’ll have to play that by ear.  After those things are addressed, I want to talk, talk, talk until we run out of things to talk about (which will probably never happen).

    6. So, what shoes will you be wearing??
    I’ll bring my black, laceless Converse All-Stars because I love them and they’re comfortable. Before I go, maybe I’ll also buy a pair of comfortable sandals that I am not ashamed to be seen wearing in public.  I’ll get a pedicure this weekend, just in case.  Anybody want to give me polish color suggestions?  I’m a little tired of the ruby red I’m sporting right now.

  • Average Jane is On Fire

    The heat, it is ridiculous.  Today’s heat index is supposed to be between 105 and 112 degrees Fahrenheit.  Every time I step outside, it’s like opening an oven door, but with the added bonus of unbreatheable humidity.  I’ve actually spent most of the day inside, but I’m still all sticky.  I’m retaining so much water that my fingers look like sausages and the waistband of my pants is cutting off my circulation.

    So how’s your week going?

    This is my annual week of non-vacation from work, wherein I help my dad run a six-day seminar.  So far things are going fairly well, but all hell will no doubt break loose tomorrow when we go from everyone in a single class to 150+ people divided into six classes in several different locations.

    The main reason I haven’t blogged this week is that I keep forgetting to set my alarm clock in the morning and by the time I wake up on my own, I only have time to put my hair in a pony tail, dab on a tiny bit of makeup, throw on clothes, take a Nexium, and head out the door.

    Until the seminar wraps up on Saturday, I’ll be running all over town, probably sweating and cursing.  So far, I’m less crabby that I thought I would be, but give me another couple of days in the heat and we’ll see how I get.

    Anyone else pining for a quick visit to the Antarctic right now?