Average Jane

Author: Average Jane

  • Average Jane Has Kids

    I'm having an interesting adventure for a few days this week: I'm staying at my sister and brother-in-law's house while they're out of town and taking care of my niece (age 8) and nephew (age 4 in a couple of weeks).

    Last night went well. Because it was Presidents' Day the kids didn't have school or daycare, so all I had to do was show up and relieve the babysitter after work. My sister had left a meal in the crockpot, so dinner was covered.

    The evening was taken up by "Spongebob Squarepants," followed by some popcorn and a rousing game of Candyland, which has changed significantly since I was a kid. What happened to the cherry pitfall? That was the best part!

    My nephew was pretty good with the game until he pulled a card that put him on a spot where he was going to lose a turn. His sister and I had to convince him that the luck of the draw applied to everyone. After that he was fine, even when he drew a card that made him go almost back to the start.

    Both kids handled their bathtime nicely and I got my nephew into his pajamas and tucked into bed by 8:30 p.m. My niece dawdled a bit with her shower, but still made it to bed pretty close to her 9:10 p.m. bedtime.

    My husband stopped by for about an hour to hang out with me, which was nice. I kind of hope he might decide to come over again tonight, just because I miss him.

    This morning felt a bit more hectic. I woke up around 7:00 a.m., which was a tiny bit later than I'd intended. I showered quickly and then went around to the kids' rooms to wake them up. As my sister had predicted, my nephew popped awake right away but my niece lay in bed for some time.

    I picked out clothes for both of them and helped my nephew get dressed, then headed downstairs to arrange breakfast. My nephew requested Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal, but wouldn't eat the bowl I fixed for him because I'd made the unthinkable decision to put milk over the cereal. I gave him a dish of plain cereal and ate the bowl I'd fixed for him. Ugh – way too sweet.

    The rest of the morning was taken up with reminding my niece to do her chores and pack her water and a snack. I got both kids out the door on time and watched my niece get on the bus, then drove my brother-in-law's enormo SUV to my nephew's daycare where I ran into Rita, who had just dropped off Dr. Arens.

    So far the experience has been great, but I have the weird feeling that I'm living someone else's life for a couple of days.

    Tonight and tomorrow morning I'll be doing it all over again, then passing the baton to my brother-in-law's aunt for the rest of the week.

    Tonight's plan: pizza, the Game of Life and maybe a cartoon or two. Sounds like fun to me.

  • Happy Valentine’s Day from Average Jane

    Here's my final batch of 1970s valentines. These four were the only ones in my scrapbook that featured recognizable characters. I'm sure you won't be surprised to see which corporate behemoth (that shall not be named here), was the pioneer in putting out branded valentines.

    Final4valentine
    Final3valentine
    Final1valentine
    Final2valentine

    There is also an odd hierarchy of valentine sizes in this set, ranging from the huge one I've put first to the much smaller one at the bottom. I guess you could give the big, nice ones to your real friends and save the little ones for your classmates that you hardly knew.

    The last one is not only the tiniest, but it's also printed on much thinner paper stock compared to the rest of them. Hmm.

    So what are you planning for Valentine's Day? My husband and I have decided that we're going out to dinner and then going bowling, which is something we seldom do. It was his idea, but he's been going around telling people how much I love to bowl, which is not exactly how I would put it. I enjoy bowling to some extent despite the fact that I've always been a terrible bowler, but it's almost always a one-way ticket to the chiropractor's office for me. Clearly our communication skills could be better considering that this is at least our 16th Valentine's Day together.

    But nevermind, I'm sure we'll have a great time and I was about due for an adjustment anyway.

    Happy Valentine's Day!

  • Still More Valentines from Average Jane

    Here's the only cat valentine in my collection. I guess dogs are a better seller.
    Valentinecat

    This next one seems kind of lame to me now, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it's the kind of valentine I might have had my mom buy for me to give out because I've always been such a huge fan of puzzles and games. I've Photoshopped out the scrawled circles (a set of correct ones and a set of wrong ones) so you can play at home.

    Valentinehearts

    In case you can't read the answers, it's No. 2 and No. 8, although I still believe that you can make a case for No. 1 and No. 7.

  • More Valentines from Average Jane

    One thing I found interesting about the valentines is that some of them have quintessentially '70s artwork:
    Valentine70s
    While others appear to be throwbacks from previous decades:
    Valentineretro
    Those are some pretty sassy fishnet gloves she's wearing. Or maybe she just has plaid cuffs on her dress sleeves – it's hard to tell.

    This one even had printing on the back. When you turn it over, you can see that the bee on the front is a separate piece with a tab that has been inserted into a slot in the heart and taped in place.

    Valentineretroback

  • Average Jane’s Doggie Valentines

    It's apparent from my limited collection of valentine cards that my classmates and I did not have a large selection from which to choose. I don't know if you've looked at the valentine aisle at the drugstore lately, but every toy, teen idol and movie has at least one set of branded valentines. When I was a kid, valentines were mostly generic, with one exception that I'll be posting later in the week.

    Here are three different cards that were obviously from the same set:

    Dogvalentine1

    This one had a die-cut, folded part that was designed to allow you to stand the card up. The card stock is pretty flimsy, but it does actually work.
    Dogvalentine2

    The only possible reason I can see for the big crease on this card is that it's larger than most of the valentines in the set, so it probably needed to be folded to fit in the envelope.
    Dogvalentine3
    The valentine copywriters, as much as they clearly enjoy a good pun, were apparently at a loss with the dog cards. Doggone it.

  • Extra Valentines from Average Jane

    Valentine3

    It turns out I have more of these valentines than I thought, so I'm not only doing an extra post today, but I'll be putting more than one per post starting right now.

    Part of the reason I'm doing an extra post right now is to encourage you – in the spirit of Valentine's Day – to consider supporting a couple of charitable endeavors.

    First is Twestival, which is being held in cities all over the world this coming Thursday, February 12th. It's a group of Twitter users and other folks in support of Charity:Water, which provides clean water to impoverished communities. The Kansas City Twestival starts at 6:00 p.m. at Tower Tavern in Martini Corner off 31st Street. The cost is $25, all of which goes to Charity:Water. There will be food, drinks and live music provided by sponsors including Tower Tavern, Boulevard Brewing Company, Svedka, Two Seconds Away and Kyle Blake. Buy your tickets today at the KC Twestival site.

    The second thing I'd like to talk about is the Third Annual Luncheon Benefiting SAFEHOME domestic violence shelter. It's sponsored by Soroptimist International of Kansas City (to which I belong) and hosted by the Outback Steakhouse in Mission, KS. It'll be held on Saturday, February 21st starting at 11:30 a.m. Tickets are $25 each, which gets you an appetizer, salad, choice of entree and dessert. Best of all, 100% of the ticket price goes to SAFEHOME, along with proceeds from the silent auction that will also be held at the event. To purchase a ticket, download this order form, visit The Little Gallery Frame Shop at 5002 State Line Road in Mission, KS (ask for Dianne) or just talk to me when you see me – I have a bunch in my purse right now!

    Valentine4
    Thanks in advance for your support of either of these great causes.

  • Average Jane’s Childhood Valentines, Day 2

    Here's one from Beth, whom I do vaguely remember. It's clearly from the same set as the previous one, down to the quotation marks around the pun.

    Valentine2

  • Average Jane’s Childhood Valentines, Day 1

    This week I'm going to feature a different 1970s Valentine each day. I apologize for the obvious yellowed Scotch tape marks on all of them. I didn't know any better when I was making my scrapbook in elementary school.

    Today's Valentine says "From=Jenny" on the back. More than thirty years later, I have no memory of a Jenny from elementary school.

    Valentine1

    Dig the retro hand-lettering!

  • Average Jane Stays Busy

    Despite my vow to keep more days open, I'm still managing to fill up my calendar almost every day. On the days I've been free, my husband has eagerly dragged me around town from store to store in an attempt to finish furnishing our new TV room.

    We're really close on the room. It has a couch, a lamp, a chair (backordered, but expected sometime this month), an area rug (to be delivered tomorrow), a TV stand (in its box, unassembled, in the back of my husband's car) and a new TV with related accoutrements, which is also still in its box since we brought it home last Saturday night.

    I'd love to get the TV all set up and working, but tonight I have to work at my dad's office and tomorrow I'm going to a concert. Friday night looks like a possibility, though.

    The really silly part about having all this great new stuff and not unpacking it yet is that our old TV is on the blink…literally. We'll be watching and suddenly the screen will go black, which means that one of us has to get up and shove it a few times until the picture comes back. If we're really lucky, a couple of foot stomps will do the trick.

    My husband thinks the problem is the S-video jack, so he's proposed wiring it up with the RCA jacks instead to see if that'll fix it. Of course, this proposed solution is purely speculative at this point, as he has not even purchased an RCA cable.

    Meanwhile, Best Buy's Geek Squad technicians are frothing at the mouth to set up an appointment to calibrate our new TV. However, a plasma screen TV needs to be used for about 200 hours before it's calibrated. At the rate we're going, it'll take us six months to watch 200 hours of television.

    So right now the new room is being used mostly as a cat playroom. I'm also getting a lot of use out of the pantry closet.

    Once the TV room part of the equation kicks in, I may never leave the house again. After all, I have 200 hours of TV to watch…

  • 25 Things About Average Jane

    I'd been tagged repeatedly in Facebook for this, so I've finally gotten a list together. Liz, I'm counting this for the "7 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Me" meme you've tagged me for as well! I'm nothing if not efficient. So here goes:

    1. I have lots and lots of friends, but I don't think I'm anyone's best friend.
    2. My very best friends are my sister and my husband.
    3. I think my niece and nephew are the most fascinating people I've ever met. I can't wait to see what they're like when they grow up.
    4. And yet, I've never really had any desire to have kids of my own.
    5. I know that I need to exercise to stay healthy, happy and fit into my clothes properly, but I can't seem to make myself do it.
    6. I am very bad about over-committing myself. Trying to parcel out my limited free time between volunteer work, my band, housework, and my family and friends leaves me stretched way too thin.
    7. If it weren't for "to-do" lists and deadlines, I'd never get anything done. In fact, while I'm writing this, I'm putting off cleaning my office.
    8. Even though I'm perfectly comfortable singing in front of large groups, I'm still an introvert.
    9. I can only handle extroverts in small doses because their energy exhausts me.
    10. I love plants and gardening, but I'm too negligent to grow anything except the most hardy plant varieties.
    11. Someday I will probably write a book. It doesn't feel like a priority right now, though.
    12. I love to bake, but I don't do it very often anymore. I miss the days when nobody thought carbs were evil.
    13. It's very difficult to be a feminist and a hard rock fan simultaneously. I have to do a lot of compartmentalizing to make it work, and sometimes I still can't quell my outrage at certain song lyrics and attitudes.
    14. I like to work in complete silence unless it's physical labor of some kind. In that case, crank it up!
    15. I love looking through old photos, but I never quite know what to do with them. They always end up being thrown in a big box until I'm ready to glance through them again.
    16. One of my goals in life is to travel more, particularly outside the U.S.
    17. Before I start spending money on travel, I want to finish fixing up my house. We still have five or six major projects left before I'll have the funds to allocate to other things.
    18. If I could to take a nap every day, I would.
    19. No matter how bad things get in the world, I remain optimistic that they can get better.
    20. Have I mentioned that I don't watch the news on TV anymore at all?
    21. It's been about a year since I joined Twitter, and it has changed my life more quickly and noticeably than any other technology I can think of.
    22. Speaking of technology, sometimes I can't believe that when I was a little kid the most high-tech thing we owned was a black and white TV with vise-grip pliers attached where the broken-off tuner knob went.
    23. The last time I went for a long hike in the woods, it was an important reminder that it's good to get away from technology and just be outside.
    24. I freely admit that having four cats is one or two too many, but we'll probably maintain that number indefinitely.
    25. This is the last "25 things about me" list that I ever intend to compile. I worked on it for two days!