Average Jane

Author: Average Jane

  • The Many Names of Average Jane

    Today seems like a great day for a meme! I picked this one up from Stupid Evil Bastard:

    1. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names):
    Ellen Walter

    2. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad):
    Robert Fredolf

    3. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 2 letters of your last name, first 4 letters of your first name):
    Licele

    4. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal):
    Green Platypus

    5. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you live):
    Alissa Mission

    6. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite alcoholic drink, optionally add “THE” to the beginning):
    Red Guinness

    7. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name):
    Cell

    8. GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite cookie):
    Cinnameg Snickerdoodle

    9. ROCK STAR NAME: (current pet’s name, current street name):
    Trillian Dearborn

    10. PORN NAME: (1st pet, street you grew up on):
    Boo Boo Foreman

  • Average Jane Shows the Rest of the Picture

    The little scribbly cartoon of me that I've used as the symbol for this blog was drawn sometime around 1994 when I was working at a printing company with a great group of women. We were all English majors who had been hired to proofread and typeset custom printed invitation and announcement cards.

    One thing you wouldn't know about the sketch is that I wasn't the only one in the drawing. I ran across my copy of the whole page, which depicts everyone on our shift at the time except for the cartoonist who drew it:

    H&F

    For the first time, meet Valorie, me, Christy and Kristine.

    Valorie still comes over from time to time for game nights and other get-togethers. Christy has lived in Indianapolis for many years and I'm overdue to visit. I haven't seen Kristine since we worked together, but she was always a lot of fun.

    My favorite thing about these cartoons is how much they capture the essence of each person. Thanks, Cari, for your spur-of-the-moment drawing that's become such a great memory.

  • A New Description for Average Jane

    Because I jumped on the bandwagon and read Twilight, then immediately went out and saw the movie, apparently I am now a "goth cougar pervert" according to a number of other bloggers/Twitterers in the same club.

    Just wait until the random Google traffic from THAT phrase starts hitting…

  • More Average Jane Band Changes

    After about a year with the band, my husband has decided that he's had enough.

    He's struggled at some of our gigs with the effort of playing four rock sets and hauling gear, too. One time he got a leg cramp right before a set started and had no choice but to play the whole thing in agony.

    He's 51 years old with diabetes and high blood pressure. He's not in good physical shape by any measure, so it's not too big of a surprise that he's having a hard time with the rock and roll lifestyle. He's ready to concentrate solely on his recording studio and leave the live music behind.

    So now we're in the midst of auditioning drummers. It's painful. All auditioning is painful, whether you're the audioner or the auditionee.

    The thing is, my husband has been a professional drummer all his life. He spent more than a decade as a studio musician in Nashville. He once toured with James Brown's Famous Flames. Even though he's older now, he's still an excellent drummer with metronome-like timing. Replacing him is not going to be easy.

    As much as I'd like to talk him into staying (and I probably could), I don't want him to stay just because of me. He needs to listen to his body and do what's best for him.

    I just hope the search doesn't go on too long. My husband will probably have no choice but to play at least some of our December gigs. If we're lucky, another great drummer will step right in after that to start out the new year with us.

  • Average Jane On Foot

    Yesterday I drove to the University of Kansas to take part in a KU Marketing Club event. Molding young minds and all that…

    On my way home, I noticed that my Honda Insight hybrid seemed awfully sluggish and that my gas mileage was lower than it would ordinarily be for highway driving. It wasn't long before an indicator light came on.

    It said "IMA," which I took to either mean that the car's computer had developed partial but as yet unspecific sentience or there was a problem. It turned out to stand for "Integrated Motor Assist," which is basically the go-between for the battery and the motor.

    I was surprised to find out that my car dealer's repair shop is open on Saturday, and I took my car in this afternoon. They dispatched a guy to drive me back home so I wouldn't have to wait. Thus, I spent the afternoon lying in bed reading Twilight with cats piled all over me. Ahhh. (Completely unrelated digression: I used to have a pony named Twilight.)

    So anyway, the car dealer finally called me and said, "Blah, blah, blah, part name, blah, blah, other part name, blah blah, order on Monday, blah, blah, blah, should be done on Tuesday." There was also something in there about the parts probably being under warranty (yay!).

    Because they had the car apart already, there was no point in arguing about the completion date. It looks like my husband and I will be sharing his car for the next few days, which means we finally have an incentive to unload all the gear from our band's last gig.

    So that's my weekend so far. How's yours going?

  • Average Jane Is Ready for Thanksgiving

    IMGP0032

    This is actually the kids' table from last Christmas, but it seemed like a good illustration for this post.

    Last Thanksgiving I put together a PDF of recipes that you could use to make a complete Thanksgiving dinner from appetizers to dessert. Click here to download it.

    This year I'll be making dinner at my house for seven people. For years, the electrical system in our house wasn't up for anything that involved turning on more than two stove burners at a time. Now that we've fixed that problem, I'm all set to turn out multiple Thanksgiving dishes at once.

    There is one little problem: I don't have a dining room. The photo above was taken at my sister's house. I'm planning on bringing up the long plastic utility table in my basement (I'll clear off all the laundry baskets) and surrounding it with every folding chair in the house. I foresee a trip to Marshall's or Tuesday Morning in my immediate future so at least I can get a decent-looking tablecloth.

    Naturally, I'll be shutting all the cats in the basement for the duration of the event. They can't be trusted not to stroll around on the table in front of the guests. People who don't have menageries aren't always very understanding about that sort of thing.

    So that's my plan for next Thursday. What are you doing?

  • Bomb Pop Martini Recipe from Average Jane’s Sister

    There was some discussion on Twitter yesterday about Bomb Pop Martinis, so I asked my sister for her recipe. It's easy and delicious.

    Bomb Pop Martini

    DeKuyper Island Blue Pucker
    Bacardi Razz
    Sweet & sour mix
    Grenadine

    Mix equal parts of Island Blue Pucker, Bacardi Razz and sweet & sour mix.  Shake WELL with ice and pour into martini glass.  Then take 1 capful of grenadine and slowly pour down the inside of glass until it settles to the bottom.

    If you're a fan of frou-frou martinis with a kick, you might also like my Tootsie Roll Martini recipe. I posted it in 2005 and it still gets a lot of Google traffic.

  • Average Jane Online

    I've hit the NaBloPoMo wall today, so here are some miscellaneous things that I've found amusing in the last few days:

    Okay, so that's a post for today. Click through and laugh.

  • The Green-Eyed Monster at Average Jane’s House

    I'm happy to report that our new kitten, Trillian, is assimilating into the household quite nicely. I've seen her playing with Velvet and my husband has watched Xena initiating play with her.

    It's great that Xena likes to play with Trillian, but there's one plaything that she simply will not share: my husband.

    Thanks to Laurie Ruettimann, I have the perfect term to describe Xena's relationship with my husband: she's his kitteh wife.

    This means that Xena feels compelled to (literally) fling herself into my husband's arms at every opportunity so he can carry her around and treat her like the queen she knows herself to be.

    Today my husband reported that Trillian had climbed into his arms for a little attention. While he was petting her, Xena came into the room, shot hate-filled looks in the kitten's direction, very deliberately climbed up on the ottoman by my husband's feet and turned her back on them.

    My husband eventually put Trillian down and tried to pet Xena, which earned him a bite on the hand. Xena then jumped down, chased the kitten into the basement, cornered her and started hassling her until she squalled for help.

    So basically we're hosting the feline version of Rock of Love in our house right now, except that at least the cats stay out of our liquor cabinet. Do you think Sharon Osbourne is available to referee?

  • Average Jane Shares An Easy Recipe

    This is a recipe I got from my friend, Monica, back when we worked at a printing company together. There were about five of us working second shift from 3:30 p.m. to 11:30 p.m. and because we were all broke and there weren't many food options nearby, we'd take turns bringing dinner for the entire department. I can't remember whether I first had her peach cobbler at work or if she brought it to a social event, but it's so delicious that I've hung onto the recipe for more than 15 years now.

    If you aren't a big pumpkin pie fan, this might be a good dessert alternative for Thanksgiving:

    Peach Cobbler

    2 large bags frozen peaches
    2 cups flour
    2 cups sugar
    1/2 tsp. salt
    1 tsp. cinnamon
    1 cup butter

    Place peaches (thawed) into a 9" x 13" pan. Combine dry ingredients and cut in butter until crumbly. Sprinkle on top of fruit. Bake at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for 45-50 minutes. Serve warm with vanilla ice cream.