Average Jane

Category: NaBloPoMo

  • Average Jane Digitally Cleans House

    KckittyThe timing may seem a little odd in a month when I'm posting daily on this blog, but yesterday I deleted my other blog.

    Kansas City Kitty came about when Average Jane was still largely pseudonymous—I'm going to guess it was around 2005. I wanted a place to talk about things happening in Kansas City, so I started the second blog and recruited my local friends Cagey, Rita and Goofy Girl as co-contributors.

    We posted mostly about places to eat and things to do in the area. When I pulled the plug yesterday, I don't think anyone had posted in at least six months and I completely understand why. The blog had long since outlived its original purpose and usefulness. My main blog has included my real name and city for years and I really don't need to shunt local content off to a separate place.

    Next on my agenda is deleting all of my disused MySpace accounts. According to the password list I looked up from my browser preferences, I have about eight of them (mostly old bands, but there's one personal one and one associated with Kansas City Kitty). I've been going through them one by one and asking to close the accounts, but I don't think that's actually happening. The last message always says there will be a confirmation email with a link that has to be clicked to complete the deletion, but I haven't gotten a single email yet.

    I did go ahead and close the Gmail account associated with Kansas City Kitty. That was satisfying because there are several people who seem to believe that it's their email address. I was constantly getting messages about kids' soccer leagues, QVC purchases, church activities, etc. It was rather annoying.

    Big thanks to Tish Grier for giving me the idea to start clearing out my digital clutter.

    Have you done anything similar?

  • Average Jane’s Guide to Happiness (Abridged)

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    I'm generally pleased with how my life is working out to date, so I don't feel so presumptuous about sharing some of the reasons for that. I'm going to frame it as advice, but you'll know which pieces to take to heart and which to ignore for your own situation.

    1. Partner with a friend. My husband and I will soon be celebrating our 17th wedding anniversary, in large part because we really like each other, have similar interests and goals, and enjoy each other's company. That said, we still have many separate interests and neither of us takes offense when the other has something planned without them.
    2. Have lots of other friends, too. Of course, there are levels of friends—all the way from "co-worker you sometimes go to lunch with" to "bestie who knows all your secrets." Not everyone you meet is going to graduate up the ranks and that's okay. My best friends are my sister and my husband, but I have hundreds of other friends that I'm interested in and spend time with in many different contexts.
    3. Get some exercise. I like walking. It's about the maximum aerobic level my asthmatic bronchial tubes can take and it energizes me. I also enjoy yoga, not only for the strength and flexibility it brings but for the way it calms my mind. Figure out what exercises you enjoy (or can at least tolerate) and make them a part of your routine.
    4. Prioritize sleep. There's nothing like lack of sleep to ruin your whole day. I am a big fan of naps and I will not hesitate to go to bed for the night as early as 8:00 p.m. if I need to. All my friends know that I'll almost never stay at an event on a weeknight past my preferred bedtime of 10:00 p.m.
    5. Support causes that speak to you, but don't over-commit. I am active with two volunteer organizations and on the board of a professional organization. Right now I have one recurring weekly volunteer commitment, I am on a couple of committees that require sporadic volunteer work, and I help maintain social media presence for all three groups. Oh, and they all have periodic meetings. That's about the maximum amount of time I can give without getting overwhelmed. With any group, there will always be more work than volunteers, but remember that you're just one person. Delegate, recruit or just say no when you have to.
    6. Nurture a living thing. For you it might be children. Or heck, maybe plants. For me, it's always been cats and now a dog. (And plants, although I'm a better pet keeper than a plant keeper.) I think it's good for the psyche to be responsible for someone other than yourself.
    7. Spend time outside. It's really easy to get disconnected from nature when you're sitting in a building surrounded by asphalt and concrete all day. Whenever you get the chance, seek out the opportunity to be surrounded by trees instead. I particularly enjoy the walking trail at Unity Village, which is where my sister hosts "Yoga in the Woods" events from time to time. Even your own back yard can be rejuvenating (moreso when you're not just out there doing yard work).
    8. Learn to eat wisely. I'm not saying you can't occasionally have meals with no redeeming value, but for the most part try to stick with foods that are nourishing, tasty and won't make you feel awful for the next few hours. If you're going to eat sweets, hold out for something really good, not just a cheap piece of candy or a dessert without much flavor. If you can't resist potato chips, don't have them in your house. If a food has been demonstrated to give you heartburn, make your gall bladder flare up, etc., eliminate it from your diet and don't look back.
    9. Take charge of your own health. As you get older, you'll probably start experiencing various and sundry health problems. Get informed about each one and make sure you get the treatments you need. Your doctor isn't going to be anywhere near as invested in your health as you are, so you have to take the lead. Of course, if you're in the U.S. your insurance status will determine how much you can really do. Don't get me started.
    10. Maintain perspective. This can be accomplished in a number of ways, but it's mostly about appreciating what you have. If you haven't seen the documentary "Happy," I highly recommend it.

    So that's my two cents on the subject of having a happy life. What important advice did I forget to include?

  • Average Jane’s Halloween

    First of all, it's NaBloPoMo or National Blog Posting Month. That means I'll be posting every day in November. I've been doing this every year since it started, so I figured I might as well continue.

    We had an extremely low-key Halloween this year. Against my better judgment, I bought a bag of candy. We got exactly two trick-or-treaters. So we'll have plenty of individually-wrapped Twizzlers to enjoy at the movies this holiday season.

    I didn't exactly decorate, but I put out a number of decorative open flames.

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    Toby lay in the Día de los Muertos-themed bed he stole from the cats and helped me watch for trick-or-treaters. Not really. He just slept.

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    Xena and Velvet decided to demonstrate how beautiful black cats look against my new comforter.

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    My husband got us a pizza and watched the Chiefs game while I surfed the net and kept an eye out for the non-existent trick-or-treaters. Finally, my lack of sleep from the previous night combined with the pizza carbs to send me to bed by 9:00 p.m.

    And that was our Halloween. How was yours?

  • No Tree This Year at Average Jane’s House

    I've already mentioned that I'm off the hook for shopping this year. That, in combination with our quickly progressing plan to move the studio cats downstairs, has caused us to decide that we are also keeping the holiday decor to a minimum. The reason? This guy:

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    Oh, he looks innocent now, but don't let him fool you. Dr. Jones is a one-man wrecking crew and there's no way we would trust him around a tippy fake tree adorned with tantalizing dangling objects.

    (Your eyes don't deceive you about one thing: he's getting kind of fat. We need to readjust the food amounts we're making available.)

    When Xena was a kitten, we made the same call at Christmastime. She was known for leaving destruction in her wake as well, so we skipped a year and waited for her to start behaving more like an adult before we took a chance on putting up the tree. (Don't believe what I wrote about putting the tree up in the studio. That never happened.)

    So I think I'm going to content myself with some wreaths and garlands placed well out of Jones' reach and save the tree – and, literally, the ornaments – for next year.

    There will still be cookies, though. Lots and lots of cookies.

  • Average Jane Gives Credit Where Credit Is Due

    I've now been walking pretty regularly since mid-summer and I have really seen a difference in my physical makeup and energy levels. Now that walks have gotten to be an almost daily occurrence, I can hardly fathom why I didn't start doing this sooner.

    Three women are responsible for my recent foray into fitness and I'd like to thank them all now.

    Bossy The first is Bossy, who ended up being my inspiration. When she was in town for her (No) Book Tour earlier this year, I had the chance to chat with her one-on-one and we got around to the subject of exercise. She said that she goes out and runs every single day and hates every minute of it. Then by the time she goes in and showers, she's glad she did it.

    That was a revelation for me. I apparently had it in my head that exercise was supposed to be fun, but the idea that it was just something you do because you have to – like brushing your teeth – really got me thinking.

    I started eyeing Couch-to-5k again and wondering if my aversion to running could be overcome.

    Luann I might have remained in the thinking and planning stage if it hadn't been for my friend LuAnn. She's the one who first suggested that she come over and walk with me in the mornings during her summer break.

    I'm incredibly grateful that she got me out of my office chair and out onto the sidewalk. She's really a runner, so I'm sure my slow walking wasn't exactly fun for her, but the walks were just what I needed.

    Librarian Last but certainly not least, there's my current walking buddy, A Librarian. She took over when LuAnn went back to school and we've gone from walking one or two days a week to walking almost every day.

    It's been incredibly helpful for me to have someone to walk with. On occasion I'll still walk our route by myself, but I much prefer having a buddy to chat with while I walk.

    We're certainly not breaking any speed records – it still takes us about an hour to cover the 3.4 mile route – but it just feels good to be outside and moving.

    So thanks, ladies, for helping me break out of the doldrums and reclaim a healthier physique. I can't imagine a more valuable gift.

  • Average Jane, Books and Cats

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    This was pretty much my angle on life for the past three days, except that most of the time I was looking at a book. Notice my husband standing in the doorway, perhaps wishing I'd put the book down and talk to him.

    Dr. Jones is constitutionally incapable of ignoring the drawstrings of a hoodie, so I've been alternating between cuddling him and fighting him off. It's going to be a long winter, considering that almost all of my jackets have drawstrings.

    Jones does get kudos for catching one of the many fat, lazy flies that have been buzzing noisily around the house. He batted it out of the air with his paws and ate it up without hesitation. I wish he'd catch them all.

    I've finished two more books since yesterday's post: A Fatal Grace by Louise Penny and The Shaman Laughs by James D. Doss. I particularly liked the first one and I'm looking forward to reading others in the series.

    I had a nice, quiet evening yesterday while my husband was off playing a gig. I made myself some cinnamon hot chocolate and popped some popcorn on the stove. I've really been enjoying my open schedule this weekend.

    Earlier today I did my volunteer shift taking care of the shelter cats at Petco. Today was claw clipping day, which went better than it sometimes does. The kittens all forgave me after I was finished.

    Now I'm back home and reading Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Philosophy: Fear and Trembling in Sunnydale, which has been in my bookcase for some time now. It's interesting so far, even though I haven't given much thought to philosophy in general since the Philosophy 101 class I took in college.

    Tonight my only plan is to make turkey pot pie out of the remaining Thanksgiving leftovers. Beyond that, I imagine I'll spend the rest of the day sitting in my chair with my books and cats. This is the life!

  • Average Jane’s Low-Key Weekend

    IMGP2315 My ambitions for the weekend have not changed since yesterday. Last night I took my husband to see the latest Harry Potter movie, but that's about the only notable thing we've done.

    A Librarian and I walked our usual 3.4 mile route this morning but in reverse, just to keep things interesting. We've decided that we're going to walk every day from now on unless there's a schedule conflict. I'm taking my treadmill to her house soon so we can still walk and chat together once the weather gets cold.

    I considered going to a yoga class this morning, but decided I felt like staying home. Instead, I read my second book of the last two days, only taking a break to run down to the sausage shop for a quick lunch.

    I've been making my way through a stack of books that my aunt brought over. So far I've read Dog on It by Spencer Quinn and Birds of a Feather by Jacqueline Winspear. I liked them both and both are mysteries, but they have almost nothing in common other than that.

    I'd like to re-read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, but I can't seem to find my copy. I suspect my sister might have it.

    Now I'm just waiting for my husband to wake up so we can hang out until he leaves for his gig tonight. It's nice having the chance to be a complete homebody sometimes.

  • Average Jane Stays Home

    Trillian I'm going to be hard pressed to find anything much to write about during this long weekend. Yesterday was mostly given over to cooking and eating an obscene amount of food.

    Today I got up for my usual 6:00 a.m. walk, had breakfast with my husband, sat in our freezing cold studio while the furnace guy replaced a part, and now I'm sitting in the living room reading through a stack of books my aunt loaned me and watching the cats play.

    If I'm lucky, I'll also be spending the weekend reading, playing with the cats, baking, doing laundry and watching the occasional TV show. Sometimes the simple things are the most enjoyable, don't you think?

  • Happy Thanksgiving from Average Jane

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    Let's not hear any nonsense about "healthier" recipes or trying to eat sensibly today. Dig in, eat until you have to unfasten the top button of your pants, and worry about your diet tomorrow.

    Oh, and don't forget to acknowledge the things for which you're thankful. Mine include:

    • My husband of almost sixteen years, who is always there with an encouraging word.
    • The rest of my family. I'm lucky to be a part of your gene pool.
    • All of the people who are helping and supporting me in my job search.
    • The many and varied friends I've made, who have each added to my life in their own ways.
    • The roof over my head and the food in the pantry.
    • Xena, Velvet, Trillian and Dr. Jones, who always brighten my day with their purrs and snuggles.
    • The future, which I am confident will be amazing in ways I cannot even imagine.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

  • Average Jane on Responsible Pet Ownership

    I grew up around a lot of animals, although not all of them were pets. We had dogs that came in and out of the house, cats that mostly lived in the barn, and horses, chickens and peacocks that obviously stayed outside. They were all well taken care of, especially once my parents got a clue about getting the barn cats spayed before they had a chance to get pregnant.

    IMGP2269These days, I have four cats of my own. Throughout my adulthood, I have had anywhere from two to five cats at once. The ones that are gone lived long, pampered lives. Unfortunately, many pets don't have that luxury.

    When I do volunteer work for a local pet rescue group, it makes me very unhappy to see how many people fail to take pet ownership seriously. I thought I'd make a list of the things that a responsible pet owner must do:

    • Understand that you're taking on a commitment that lasts for the pet's entire life. My cats have all lived to be 16-18 years old. Not all of them have behaved perfectly, so in some cases I've had to deal with their various issues for almost two decades. If you aren't in it for the long haul, don't get a pet.
    • Get your pet spayed or neutered. The world is full of wonderful animals with great personalities. There's nothing special about your particular pet's DNA. If you had any idea how many pets are euthanized in shelters each day, you'd never dream of facilitating the birth of yet another litter.
    • Provide regular medical care for your pet. They need vaccinations every year and any illness they get is best handled sooner rather than later. If your vet is too expensive, shop around or investigate low-cost clinics.
    • Give your pet wholesome food and fresh water at all times. However, don't overfeed. Do what you can to keep your pet at an optimum weight.
    • Make sure your pet receives the proper level of companionship and activity. Some breeds of animal do best with an animal companion. Others require a lot of attention from humans. Some animals need lots of exercise and others can be content with toys.
    • Provide a safe environment for your pet. Make sure they're sheltered from extremes of temperature and secured to prevent them from running off and getting injured.
    • Discipline gently. There's no excuse for treating an animal with harshness or violence.

    That's really about it. Not so hard, right?

    I have pets in my life because I love and enjoy them. I wish everyone felt the same.