Blog

Average Jane Digitally Cleans House

The timing may seem a little odd in a month when I'm posting daily on this blog, but yesterday I deleted my other blog.

Kansas City Kitty came about when Average Jane was still largely pseudonymous—I'm going to guess it was around 2005. I wanted a place to talk about things happening in Kansas City, so I started the second blog and recruited my local friends Cagey, Rita and Goofy Girl as co-contributors.

We posted mostly about places to eat and things to do in the area. When I pulled the plug yesterday, I don't think anyone had posted in at least six months and I completely understand why. The blog had long since outlived its original purpose and usefulness. My main blog has included my real name and city for years and I really don't need to shunt local content off to a separate place.

Next on my agenda is deleting all of my disused MySpace accounts. According to the password list I looked up from my browser preferences, I have about eight of them (mostly old bands, but there's one personal one and one associated with Kansas City Kitty). I've been going through them one by one and asking to close the accounts, but I don't think that's actually happening. The last message always says there will be a confirmation email with a link that has to be clicked to complete the deletion, but I haven't gotten a single email yet.

I did go ahead and close the Gmail account associated with Kansas City Kitty. That was satisfying because there are several people who seem to believe that it's their email address. I was constantly getting messages about kids' soccer leagues, QVC purchases, church activities, etc. It was rather annoying.

Big thanks to Tish Grier for giving me the idea to start clearing out my digital clutter.

Have you done anything similar?

November 3, 2011
Average Jane’s Guide to Happiness (Abridged)
I'm generally pleased with how my life is working out to date, so I don't feel so presumptuous about sharing some of the reasons for that. I'm going to frame it as advice, but you'll know which pieces to take to heart and which to ignore for your own situation.
1. Partner with a friend. My husband and I will soon be celebrating our 17th wedding anniversary, in large part because we really like each other, have similar interests and goals, and enjoy each other's company. That said, we still have many separate interests and neither of us takes offense when the other has something planned without them.
2. Have lots of other friends, too. Of course, there are levels of friends—all the way from "co-worker you sometimes go to lunch with" to "bestie who knows all your secrets." Not everyone you meet is going to graduate up the ranks and that's okay. My best friends are my sister and my husband, but I have hundreds of other friends that I'm interested in and spend time with in many different contexts.
3. Get some exercise. I like walking. It's about the maximum aerobic level my asthmatic bronchial tubes can take and it energizes me. I also enjoy yoga, not only for the strength and flexibility it brings but for the way it calms my mind. Figure out what exercises you enjoy (or can at least tolerate) and make them a part of your routine.
4. Prioritize sleep. There's nothing like lack of sleep to ruin your whole day. I am a big fan of naps and I will not hesitate to go to bed for the night as early as 8:00 p.m. if I need to. All my friends know that I'll almost never stay at an event on a weeknight past my preferred bedtime of 10:00 p.m.
5. Support causes that speak to you, but don't over-commit. I am active with two volunteer organizations and on the board of a professional organization. Right now I have one recurring weekly volunteer commitment, I am on a couple of committees that require sporadic volunteer work, and I help maintain social media presence for all three groups. Oh, and they all have periodic meetings. That's about the maximum amount of time I can give without getting overwhelmed. With any group, there will always be more work than volunteers, but remember that you're just one person. Delegate, recruit or just say no when you have to.
6. Nurture a living thing. For you it might be children. Or heck, maybe plants. For me, it's always been cats and now a dog. (And plants, although I'm a better pet keeper than a plant keeper.) I think it's good for the psyche to be responsible for someone other than yourself.
7. Spend time outside. It's really easy to get disconnected from nature when you're sitting in a building surrounded by asphalt and concrete all day. Whenever you get the chance, seek out the opportunity to be surrounded by trees instead. I particularly enjoy the walking trail at Unity Village, which is where my sister hosts "Yoga in the Woods" events from time to time. Even your own back yard can be rejuvenating (moreso when you're not just out there doing yard work).
8. Learn to eat wisely. I'm not saying you can't occasionally have meals with no redeeming value, but for the most part try to stick with foods that are nourishing, tasty and won't make you feel awful for the next few hours. If you're going to eat sweets, hold out for something really good, not just a cheap piece of candy or a dessert without much flavor. If you can't resist potato chips, don't have them in your house. If a food has been demonstrated to give you heartburn, make your gall bladder flare up, etc., eliminate it from your diet and don't look back.
9. Take charge of your own health. As you get older, you'll probably start experiencing various and sundry health problems. Get informed about each one and make sure you get the treatments you need. Your doctor isn't going to be anywhere near as invested in your health as you are, so you have to take the lead. Of course, if you're in the U.S. your insurance status will determine how much you can really do. Don't get me started.
10. Maintain perspective. This can be accomplished in a number of ways, but it's mostly about appreciating what you have. If you haven't seen the documentary "Happy," I highly recommend it.
So that's my two cents on the subject of having a happy life. What important advice did I forget to include?
November 2, 2011
Average Jane’s Halloween

First of all, it's NaBloPoMo or National Blog Posting Month. That means I'll be posting every day in November. I've been doing this every year since it started, so I figured I might as well continue.

We had an extremely low-key Halloween this year. Against my better judgment, I bought a bag of candy. We got exactly two trick-or-treaters. So we'll have plenty of individually-wrapped Twizzlers to enjoy at the movies this holiday season.

I didn't exactly decorate, but I put out a number of decorative open flames.

Toby lay in the Día de los Muertos-themed bed he stole from the cats and helped me watch for trick-or-treaters. Not really. He just slept.

Xena and Velvet decided to demonstrate how beautiful black cats look against my new comforter.

My husband got us a pizza and watched the Chiefs game while I surfed the net and kept an eye out for the non-existent trick-or-treaters. Finally, my lack of sleep from the previous night combined with the pizza carbs to send me to bed by 9:00 p.m.

And that was our Halloween. How was yours?

November 1, 2011
Average Jane Gains A Room

Guess where I slept last night? If you guessed "in my bedroom," you're right! Yesterday I finally got the painting finished and moved the furniture back in. All that's left is to get some shades, which I might just go ahead and do tonight once our three trick-or-treaters have come and gone.

Here's what it looked like around midnight last night. Forgive the horrible photography:

I woke up early both days this weekend to start painting. On Saturday I did the second coat on the walls and the first coat on the trim. On Sunday I finished the trim and it became quite obvious that I didn't have enough paint left for the closet doors. As long as I needed to buy paint anyway, I decided to go with an accent color:

Orange makes me happy. That's probably why we now have three rooms in our house decorated in various shades of orange.

It also gave me the opportunity to switch from eggshell to semi-gloss for the doors, which will help them withstand wear-and-tear a little better.

While I was on my way to the hardware store for paint, I got a text that one of the volunteers from my animal rescue group was dealing with kittens that someone had dumped at one of the stores where we display our adoptable cats. They'd been left outside the store in a lidless crate with a note, so the store employees rounded up the two kittens they could find (we have no way of knowing how many there were to begin with) and gave them food, water, a litterbox and a blanket for snuggling.

I called A Librarian to see if she'd be willing to foster them at least temporarily and she agreed, but was on her way to work. I went and picked up the kittens (friendly little orange tabbies, probably 5-6 weeks old), installed them in a cat condo in my friend's garage, and went home to get back to work.

Part of my afternoon was taken up with a fundraising event at Veronica's Voice with my Soroptimist Club, but I changed back into my painting clothes as soon as I got back and did my two coats of orange paint on the closet doors and the panels of the inside of the room door.

Oh, and I spilled some of the orange paint at an inopportune moment that allowed Xena to track through it and get it everywhere. So now there's an orange cat footprint on my pillowcase for all eternity. Thanks, Xena.

The one thing that isn't finished is the inside of the closet. I did a stunningly poor job of patching the hole in my closet wall and caulking the huge crack along one corner seam. (Big thanks to @WordofChris for giving me drywall screws for the project.)

I'm going to paint the interior of the closet white, in part because it doesn't have a light. I predict that my husband will be able to move his stuff back in no later than next weekend.

It was a long, two-month process but it was SO worth it! We love the way the bedroom looks and I cannot wait to start entertaining again now that I have a living room.

Man, I'm tired.

October 31, 2011
Average Jane Walks for Charity

I'm signed up for two charity 5K walks the first two weekends in November, so I figured I would tell you why I was drawn to the charities in question and see if I can rustle up a few donations and/or fellow walkers.

The first is the Jeff Taylor Run for SAFE, named for a Riverside, Missouri police officer who was struck by lightning and killed while conducting search and rescue operations in the aftermath of the tornado that hit Joplin, Missouri earlier this year. Funds raised go to support an organization that aids the surviving spouses and families of law enforcement officers killed in the line of duty.

I'm doing this one partly because Cagey invited me, but mainly because I grew up around police officers (not to mention that my brother-in-law is one) and I understand how dangerous their jobs can be and how important this charity is for families left behind.

This one doesn't involve fundraising, but I'd love to have other KC folks join us. I think Cagey is planning on doing some running, so I could use someone to walk with me!

My second event is the Lung Hill Run, which I'll be walking with @bonnieglick. (Notice how they're all called runs and yet I'm walking. I'm just not a runner.) This is one where donations are important. It benefits LUNGevity Foundation, the leading private provider of research funding for lung cancer.

I lost my mother to lung cancer in 1998 and my stepmother died from it at the beginning of this year. It's a horrible, horrible disease that is much more prevalent than people realize. I feel very strongly about improving early detection and treatment protocols to save others from the same fate.

On a lighter note, I'm looking forward to enjoying the brisk fall mornings with motivated people. If you'd like to join me or throw some money into the pot, I'd very much appreciate either one.

Thanks for reading!

October 26, 2011
Average Jane Gets Crowded Out

When my sister posted this photo of my niece asleep with her favorite cat, Hutch, wrapped around her head, it made me realize I had a post in the making about the various pets that are always competing with me with for bed space.

In general, I have no objection to sharing my bed with any of the other beings in the household. Well, my husband does snore more than I'd like…

Anyway, that can mean as many as three cats and a dog jockeying for space on a queen-sized bed with me and sometimes my husband as well, depending on his sleep schedule. Fortunately there's never a fourth cat in that equation. Xena and Trillian take turns because they can't stand the sight of one another.

Toby is always the first to join me. He curls into a compact ball and presses himself against me. If I'm lucky, he keeps his back to me. Otherwise, I get his feet poking me at random intervals when he stretches in his sleep. Either way, he tends to cause me to move closer to the edge of the bed than I'd prefer.

Xena likes to cuddle. She especially loves to settle her great bulk into my husband's armpit and drape herself onto his shoulder, but she'll accept me as a substitute if he's not available. It's kind of nice to be able to hug her while I'm sleeping, but she's awfully warm. She also likes to get under the covers near our feet, which is where she was when I woke up today.

Velvet usually lingers around my head – all the better for licking my hair when she gets the urge. I wish she wouldn't.

Dr. Jones spends all day sacked out on the bed by himself, so he doesn't seem to feel as compelled to lie there when we're there. Still, he'll occasionally come up and settle himself on my chest.

Trillian is an even rarer visitor, but she'll go right for your chest as well. She really prefers to interact with people who are sitting up, though, because she likes to be held and snuggled.

So that's why I have dark circles under my eyes every day. Just kidding! That's genetic.

No, the pets are really fine most of the time. I'm sure I'd sleep somewhat more restfully without them, but I'd miss them. Every time I stay in a hotel room, I wish I had at least one cat to keep me company.

How about you? Do you allow pets on the bed at your house or keep them somewhere else while you sleep?

October 26, 2011
Average Jane Goes To A Party

All last week I looked forward to Friday night because Cagey was hosting a Bridesmaids viewing party. I ordered a batch of white cupcakes with white buttercream frosting and dug my yellowed wedding dress out of the closet to be part of the decor.

I'll bet you can tell which dress is mine! In my defense, it is from 1965.

Other women brought their wedding photos and other memorabilia. It was fun to reminisce about our weddings. Mine was almost 17 years ago, but I've never gotten around to having the dress cleaned and packaged. Maybe I'll get on that before our 20th anniversary.

My friend Allison is there on the right, wearing a maternity bridesmaid dress. Classic.

Some even ventured to wear their wedding shoes, which is something I could not do because I disposed of those uncomfortable suckers at the first possible opportunity after I was finished wearing them.

There was a great turnout and lots of delicious snacks and drinks.

I'd never seen the movie, so I got the chance to enjoy it for the first time with a raucous group of women.

I stayed out way past my bedtime that night, so obviously a good time was had by all. The next day I did a bunch of volunteer work with cats and got the first coat of paint on the walls of my bedroom, which is going to look fantastic when it's done.

I was going to finish painting on Sunday, but then…something happened. It turned out that the the party's Bridesmaids theme had one more twist, specifically related to the notorious scene in the dress shop. Yes, several of us who had attended the party came down with same intestinal virus on Sunday morning.

It didn't take long to figure out the connection, thanks to misery-laden Facebook posts and tweets. It was pretty much a 24-hour thing, but that certainly isn't a 24-hour period I want to revisit anytime soon (or ever).

Fortunately I didn't ruin any couture, but I did throw up in my front yard while I was walking Toby. I hope none of my neighbors saw me, but the odds are not in my favor considering that it was a beautiful day outside.

The one-day gap between the party and the illness served to keep the fun memories intact, even though it is obvious in retrospect that we had a Patient Zero situation going on at the time. I highly recommend seeing the movie if you haven't. I liked it in every respect and it got extra points from me for featuring Chris O'Dowd.

I'm back to feeling fine now and although I'm a little behind on my painting, I think I can get it finished up on Tuesday night and start moving the furniture back in as soon as the trim dries.

How was your weekend?

October 24, 2011
Average Jane Almost Has Her Bedroom Back

We've been sleeping in our living room since early September and it looks like we'll finally be moved back into the bedroom next week.

The ceiling and floor have been finished for a while, but we were waiting for two replacement windows to be manufactured and delivered. In my town, you have to have a building permit to put in replacement windows, so I've made two trips to City Hall and paid $33 for that privilege. With that out of the way, we're on the installer's schedule for next Monday afternoon. Woohoo!

Now I just need to smooth the plaster repairs and patch the big hole in our closet wall where some random plumber once accessed pipes that no longer even exist in that location. After that I'll caulk around all of the window and door frames, paint the walls, paint the trim, door and closet doors, and then we'll be set to move back in as soon as the windows are in place.

Well, almost set. First I have to stick felt pads to the bottoms of all of the bedroom furniture. The floor was in such bad shape before that I'd never bothered. THEN I can move the furniture back.

One detail that's been overlooked is blinds for the room. I keep telling our blinds guy (yes, we have a blinds guy. Don't you?) that I need to have him come over so I can place an order, but that hasn't happened yet. I'm guessing we'll be hanging blankets over our windows like college students for a little while.

I cannot tell you how nice it will be to get our bed out of the living room. First of all, it's incredibly awkward when someone comes over. Beyond that, it works out very poorly with my husband's and my opposite sleep schedules, especially since the open kitchen doorway is only about ten feet away from the foot of the bed. He makes a sandwich at 2:00 a.m. and I wake up. I use the blender for my breakfast shake at 7:30 a.m. and it keeps him up. Any time the awake person does anything at all in the main part of the house, the dog gets up to see what's happening.

This is the last home improvement project we'll be doing for a while. It really wasn't in our budget at all, but circumstances aligned to get it started and we just kind of ran with it. I certainly don't regret it at all. For years our bedroom has been so unsightly that we've kept the lights off and closed the door anytime we had company. It will be refreshing to have a room that doesn't have to be hidden from passers-by.

I'm not going to mind spending the weekend painting. It's my favorite home project to do (except for the taping, which I'm sure everyone hates) and I am really looking forward to completing the room's transformation. I'll post pictures when we're moved back in. I can't wait!

October 19, 2011
Average Jane Has Little To Report

I keep meaning to post more often, but a lot of the stuff I'm doing lately is either not very interesting (e.g., the routine business trip I took last week) or stuff I've written about before (e.g., my umpteenth cat volunteering activity yesterday evening). I think I just need to get back into the mindset of finding the interesting aspects of everyday events.

One unusual thing from yesterday: yoga at an Old Navy store, taught by my sister.

I jumped out of savasana to grab my phone and take this photo of the athletic gear-clad mannequins looming over my sister as she wrapped up the class. At first it was kind of weird to do a class in the middle of a retail store, but once the yoga brainwaves kicked in, I didn't really notice or care.

I did grab several pairs of sweet yoga pants for $12.50 each, so it was a definite win. Now I kind of want to wear yoga pants all the time, but I know better than to be that guy.

Today I'm going to the Kansas City Renaissance Festival with my dad. It was his idea, and why not? It's the last day of the festival and I can tell that the weather is going to be spectacular. I was momentarily tempted to bring Toby with me, but I think the logistics would be a little too complicated. Maybe next year.

Last week I had my annual flu shot and ended up having a really bad reaction. As the day wore on, my joints started to ache. When I got home from work, I made brownies and took them to a dinner party even though I was not feeling well. Once I was at the party, I continued feeling worse and worse. My muscles started aching and my face was flushed, so I left really early and went to bed around 9:00 p.m. I kept waking up suffering throughout the night until I finally thought to take a couple of Tylenols. That pretty much did the trick, but ugh. Still, it's better than having the flu.

I guess I had a little bit to report after all. Nothing earthshattering, that's for sure.

Toby keeps poking my mouse hand with his snout, so I guess I'll wrap this up. Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

October 16, 2011
Scene from Average Jane’s Marriage

Husband (holding packages of lunch meat and cheese): Do we have any crackers?

Me: I don't know…

Husband: Okay, I can just eat the meat and cheese.

Me: …but if we have them they'd be in the cabinet over the stove.

[I open cabinet. Husband reaches in and pulls out an entire box of saltines.]

Me: Just because I don't know doesn't mean we don't have them. Were you really not going to even look?

October 10, 2011