Average Jane Is Not Trying To Ignore You

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I had a conversation with my husband the other day that made me realize that he and I are at opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to being friendly with people we encounter in our day-to-day life.

Husband: Do you remember Brian at the pharmacy?

Me: ?

Husband: He was there when we first started going there. He went back to school [blah, blah, blah – I'll admit I wasn't paying much attention] and now he's back working on Sundays.

Me: I really don't remember him, but I might if I saw him. I'm afraid I don't pay that much attention when I'm involved in a purchase.

Husband: You're really not very friendly, are you?

Me: No. No, I'm not.

And it's true. My husband knows the names of everyone he regularly encounters at the restaurants and stores he frequents. He knows what's going on in their lives in more detail than I probably know what's up with my actual friends.

If he came home one day and said, for example, "John from the bagel shop needs to stay with us for a while because he's homeless and couch surfing and has nowhere else to go," I would not be surprised for an instant. And then I would have to ask how tall John is because only one of our two couches is long enough for most people to sleep on—and I wouldn't know which bagel shop guy he was talking about until I saw his face.

Is that a guy thing? An extrovert thing? I don't know.

I don't tend to ask people a lot of questions. I was raised with a strong, "Mind your own business" ethic and I always figure that people will tell me if there's something going on that they want me to know about. That's friends, though. It really never occurs to me to ask personal questions of acquaintances and casual contacts.

It's certainly not that I don't care. Reading blogs and following people on Facebook and Twitter exposes me to exactly the kinds of things that the writers want to share with others. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by all of the personal happenings—good and bad—that I read about online.

So I don't know how to feel about the fact that I was neither aware of our pharmacist's absence and return, nor does it make any difference to me. I'm not at all rude in public, just businesslike.

Which side of the spectrum do you fall under? Super friendly, all business or somewhere in between?

Photo credit: ~*Ally*~

Comments

10 responses to “Average Jane Is Not Trying To Ignore You”

March 13, 2012

Dawn

HAHA!
I never have any idea and my husband is the best friend of all he encounters. Without fail, we will be walking somewhere in MONTREAL and someone will “know” him.
I don’t even answer the phone for pete’s sake, let alone make important eye contact with strangers!

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March 13, 2012

cagey (Kelli Oliver George)

I’m super-friendly and know most of the checkers by name at the Hen House we frequent. Manoj and I also get to know wait staff’s names if we go to a restaurant repeatedly.
I love this post because that would not surprise me either if your husband invited someone to live on your couch! Hee.

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March 13, 2012

Spyder

I think you are very friendly, kind and compassionate. But I think you just go about it in a different way than he does.

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March 14, 2012

Xavier Onassis

I’m like you but worse. I despise idle chit chat with strangers. I’m not there for the “Scooters Experience”. Just shut up, ring me up and let me be on my way.

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March 14, 2012

Barb Holter

This really amused me.I guess I fall into the “not too friendly to strangers” category.My late friend Elaine regularly button holed strangers and extracted their life stories from them. She won many friends and a husband from this tactic. She genuinely was interested in everyone. My grandma Hagen was this way, and corresponded forever with a woman she met on a train. I hope there is nothing wrong with us. I do love my friends and relatives, and socialize when I am supposed to. bzh

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March 14, 2012

A Librarian

I do think it is an introvert/extrovert thing. When I was in college a friend of mine used to get so frustrated because I couldn’t even tell her any information about potential dates, much less waitstaff.

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March 14, 2012

Pudenda Non Grata

“…..I’m not at all rude in public, just businesslike……”
Have you considered the possibility that perhaps business like behaviour is considered rude by some?

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March 14, 2012

Christy

I can’t even begin to imagine you behaving rudely. I think it’s like A Librarian said above–sounds like an introvert/extrovert thing. Neither approach is bad, just different.

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March 15, 2012

monster beats

I’m super-friendly and know most of the checkers by name at the Hen House we frequent

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March 16, 2012

Hound Doggy

I run a store and I find it “interesting” that people tell me so much about themselves. Really personal stuff too. Some people think they are my friends. They aren’t. They don’t even know my name.
I am friendly to my customers, I follow their lead.
But on my own…in my natural state…quiet and observing.

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